PART TWENTY-SEVEN: The Secret Diary of Dobrava Yaroslavovna, Aged 9 (1358-1362)

They told me Daddy died, and that now I was empress of Rome and that my brother Yuriy was Grand Duke of Kiev.

I said that wasn’t fair, since I thought noble girls are equal to noble boys, so why don’t I get to go home like Yuiry does?

They said that because I’m older I’m the boss of him and empress of Byzantium-Kiev, but because of special Kievan laws I can’t be tsar of both like Daddy was.

They always call things about Kiev “special” and “different” and “strange”. I’m from Kiev! One time everyone in the Roman Empire was different, and they were all Turks and Greeks and Italians and Arabs and Bulgars and Croatians and Cumans and Pechenegs, but now they’re all Romans. Why are Russians more different?

I asked them how Daddy died.

Nobody would tell me.

I was really scared about being Tsaritsa of Kiev-Byzantium, but they told me not to worry about it, since a trustworthy vassal would take care of things until I’m big enough to do it myself.

I got more scared.

Knyaz Sotan took me on his knee and told me he’d do all the things my daddy said he was going to, like make it so everyone could have their own Patriarch as long as they were good Orthodoxes and venerated St. Valeria and the Sainted Emperors a lot.

When we still lived in our nice castle in Kiev, Daddy always said that Order of the Sainted Emperors was just a bunch of political stuff real Christians don’t need to worry about it. He didn’t say that after he became Emperor, though.

Queen Basillike of Sicily came all the way from Neapolis to Constantinople just to take care of me! She’s really nice and she’s really smart. She tells me that books are really important and that the volumes of Greek, Latin, and Arabic in my library are as important to the empire as the swords my soldiers carry around. She said that I should write this diary so that people in the future will know all about me? I said that sounds like a lot of work. But I did it anyway.

But she also lets me play with real swords too so it’s not very boring.

I like her.

The New Senate kept on sending my priests to the Golden Horde to try to convert the Khans. They never seemed to come back.

Queen Basillike told me that there are a lot of people in the empire who don’t like me very much. But she also said that lots of emperors and empresses had vassals who didn’t like them very much, so I shouldn’t feel sad, since they still did great things anyway.

She also ordered new stables built up in Tuscany, so that when I came to Italy to visit her I could ride around on a beautiful strong horse just like in Constantinople.

I asked her for a bigger retinue, but she said that thanks to me getting the retinues of both Kiev and the Roman Empire I already had too many soldiers standing around and I should be lucky that nobody’s taken away the extras. I guess she’s right?

(nb: note that retinue cap =/= number of actual soldiers in our retinue, we don’t have like a 34k standing army)

Rashka is part of the empire again! Everyone’s really happy about it besides Basillike.

“You should always be suspicious when your vassals start to think they can do as they please without consulting the imperial government,” she said.

“Aren’t you my vassal?” I asked her.

She told me I was very smart and taking to my lessons well.

Yuriy’s vassals thought they could do as they please, and they declared war on him to try to steal Kiev.

“Hello, my dear. My name’s Leon. Knyaz Sotan had to go back to Crimea to do some very important things, so now I’m going to look after the empire for you, for a while.”

I wish my doukes would stop talking to me as if I’m stupid.

I was right to be worried about vassals doing as they pleased. They’re trying to do the same thing to me that they did to Yuriy.

Basillike said I need to get out of Constantinople because I’ll be safer in my own duchy in Tuscany, and she needs to be back in Neapolis to order her vassals around. So we slipped out of the city by sea. I wondered if I’d ever see it again.

Komitas Branas isn’t a Yaroslavovich. He’s not even a Komnenos! If you go back far enough, he’s descended from Emperor Kyriakos Komnenos. My grandmom was a Komnenos, so I’m a lot more of one than he is. But he’s Greek and not Russian, and I guess that’s all the doukes of Greece care about.

Note from Basillike di Chios: Our young empress is a bright young lady, but there are some things I want to clarify a few things about the outbreak of this civil war that might have been too subtle for her to grasp— although she does always surprise me.

Branas is just a puppet claimant of course— the real power behind the throne is Doux Helias II Altuntekin of Paphlagonia. He’s a fascinating man, and were it not for his treasonous actions, I’d say I admire the tenacity of his dynasty. Maybe I still do? It’s not his ancestors’ fault that their scion stabbed his empress in the back.

The Altunekins epitomize the blurry line between “Greek” and “Turkish” in Anatolia. Their family is of Turkish descent— which is not terribly uncommon, of course. What’s more interesting is that their line has ruled Paphlagonia for centuries— even back in the days of the Seljuk Empire! A remarkable ability to weather any political storm, to be sure.[/i]

Almost all of Greece and Anatolia are in revolt! But most of Italy is loyal, except for the Patriarch of Rome and the Katepano of Venice. Rome and Venice are pretty important! But my lands in Tuscany are safe, and Basillike is keeping most of the rest in line. So at least there’s somewhere that’s safe for me.

Basillike decided that her forces and my levies from Tuscany would try to take Rome first, so that we could be sure the Italian mainland would be safe after she marched east to link up with our other armies in Greece and Anatolia.

She says that our eastern forces are doing well, but I can tell she’s worried since there’s so many bad guys out there and more and more keep coming.

The fighting was especially bad around Constantinople. I’m glad I escaped to Tuscany!

At least Kiev stayed loyal! The princes of Kiev might not like my brother very much, but they like me better than Komitas, I guess. Look how many of them there are!

Money is running low, apparently. After we ran out, we were able to borrow more. But Basillike isn’t very sure how long it’ll last. We have a lot of soldiers to pay, and very little money coming in.

There’s trouble in Italy, too— the Pope has turned his mercenary armies on the rebel Patriarch of Rome!

Note from Basillike di Chios: Ah, the Papal sack of Rome! As brutal as any of the great sackings of antiquity. Rome herself was famously spared from any fighting in Valeria the Apostle’s war to claim it, and the only looting was the Pope withdrawing his personal fortune to the vaults of Orbetello.

This time, the fortunes of war were less kind of Rome. Imagine a hundred thousand mercenaries, who for decades have been living in ranshackle settlements across the Papal state that are halfway between real townships and armed camps. The world you thought you knew had fallen apart, the kings you had served for generations embracing what you saw as the most vile of heresies. Is it any wonder so many men who found they had nothing to lose threw in their lot with the Popes?

Is it any wonder that, when turned loose upon a city that they considered theirs but had embraced heresy under a foreign master, their retribution would be severe?

Rome, decades after its reincorporation into the Roman Empire, was just barely beginning to regain some of its ancient splendor.

Now, it is a ruin once again.

And yet, with the Patriarch of Rome out of the civil war, I can send my forces east to fight with the Kievans and the few loyal Greeks. Perhaps there is hope?

While my brother was busy fighting for me, the Rurikoviches stole the throne of Kiev from him. Father always said the Rurikoviches and Komnenoi were our family, but I don’t believe that.

Still, the Kievan soldiers fight in our armies, and with their help we have a huge numerical advantage over the rebels! Basillike said that the latest news was that the combined army of Byzantium-Kiev had engaged the largest rebel army in Anatolia! If they’re victorious, we could win the war! And now would be a good time to win the war, since we’ve run out of money again, and we can’t borrow any more until we pay the first bit back.

Basillike says that Kievan soldiers aren’t actually very good at fighting Romans.

I don’t think I’m going to be able to go back to Constantinople any time soon.

Assassination Scorecard:
Tsars Killed: 2
Badshahs Killed: 2
Sultans Killed: 7
Nosy Chancellors Killed: 2
Katepanos Killed: 1
Mad Bishops Killed: 1
Adventurers Killed: 1
Popes Killed: 2

Battle Scorecard
Badshahs Killed: 1
Sultans Killed: 1
Katepanos Killed: 1
That guy who killed our genius heir: 1

World Map, 1362